CHESS METHODS By M. G. Sturm |
CHESS December, 1946
FOREWORD
This article is written for Chess players, that is, those who play the game over the board. It is not intended for problemists and analysts. The latter two, forms of the art do not contain the element of conflict, which may be worth cultivating. In these days, when we cannot fight like gentlemen without incurring the wrath of the community, and subsequent incarceration, let us turn to the Chess board for relief.
Being of a generous disposition, I desire to give my fellow creatures the benefit of my researches into unexploited psychological and other resources in chess. Hence this article.
Chess players, I hope, are solely concerned with how to win. And this article is written to show them how to do it. It is not recommended to waste one's efforts on unimportant or so-called "friendly" games. There should always be something at stake, preferably money.
METHOD THE FIRST
Gaining the White Pieces
The most important part of the opening is to gain the White pieces, or the Black pieces. if you prefer those. We will assume you prefer playing with White. Most people do.
Place a black pawn in your left hand, and. a white pawn in your right. Thrust both hands across the table, with the left hand slightly advanced. If your opponent is right-handed,, which he probably is, he will almost invariably choose your left hand and the black pieces. The method of placing a black pawn in; each hand lacks subtlety and is usually discovered. Two black pawns, however, may be used in the following method.
Take an empty Chess box, and place two black pawns in it. Hold it above your head as high as you can,. And make an infernal row rattling the pawns in the box. Say to your opponent, "Choose." Keep the box as far out of,his reach as you possibly can. He will of course choose a black pawn. The identity of the remaining pawn can usually be covered. In the box method the pawns may be substituted by two slips of paper with "Black. written on each.
The method of spinning a coin pays well if you possess a coin with two "tails. Your opponent will probably shout heads,' If you do not possess, such a coin, or for some reason your opponent's coin is about to be used, refuse this method on the grounds that you cannot tolerate anything which tends to commercialise Chess.
Your colour may be decided before hand by the, tournament rules. In these circumstances, if you are playing Black, sit down in front of the white pieces.
When your opponent protests, say :-
But I've got the white pieces, old boy."
No, I have."
You're wrong, but if you're in any doubt about it, go and find out."
"Why the Hell should I and not you."
Because, I'm certain, and you're not.",
When he has gone on this errand, start his clock. When he returns, triumphant, he will probably,.in his elation, overlook the fact that he has lost a little time. If he does notice that his clock is going, you can deny any knowledge of the fact, or calmly suggest that it has been started by an, official. Further investigation of, the business will certainty unsettle him, and you can start his clock again, if he has stopped it. You will, probably find, however, that he will overlook or accept, the starting of his clock, and you will have gained a little time. which is better than nothing.
METHOD THE SECOND
The Use of the Clock
Time is a very important element, and the correct use of the Chess clock has decided many a battle.
Chess without clocks is not Chess at all and in such a game you can simply refuse to move when it is your turn to do so. In the absence of clocks your opponent cannot possibly object to such procedure unless be wishes to appear ill mannered.
If your opponent moves, and fails to stop his clock, you can refrain from moving until his time runs out, when of course you claim the game : or until he notices that, his clock is still running, and stops it. In the, latter case you may have gained, a considerable amount of time. Many a fine game has been won by this method.
If your opponent leaves the board while you are considering a move, start his clock. You must use your own judgement, and your formed opinion of your adversaries powers of observation in deciding whether or not to stop his clock before he is due to return. Scouts may be unobtrusively posted to warn you of his approach. Never forget that any comments by spectators call for a vigorous official complaint on your part. Such gratuitous interference, is not to be tolerated. Actual meddling with the machinery of Clocks, before the game. is not to be recommended, on account of its difficulty.
I know very few players who can succeed, while considering their move in starting their opponent's clock, he being present at the board. Such players certainly deserve the title of master, in their own line. The starting of the clock is usually done slowly and deliberately, the action being cloaked by some diversion such as lighting a cigarette, stirring. a cup of coffee, or asking if there is a doctor in the house. This method when successful, is pretty to watch.
If you are up against an enemy who has stated, coram publico, or for your ear alone, that he has to catch bus, a train, or a tram at a certain time, spin your tine out to the limit. It is quite legitimate to do so. If only for the reason that your opponent's ill-advised statement about catching vehicles is bound to have a disturbing effect on your own, play.
In a time scramble, when your opponent is short of time, and is obliged to move, quickly, it very often pays to capture one of his men without moving capturing unit at all. He will then, under stress of time, probably move his re-capturing (or as he thinks) piece to the square vacated. by the piece you have just taken. You then whip off his second piece with your own piece, which the poor fellow thinks he has just captured. This method may of course arouse objection, but is liable to cause such confusion that you nay get away with it. The following game, culminating in a " brilliancy,?' is a good. example, of a win by this method.
Black is in serious time trouble. Never mind why, has, about ten moves to make in five seconds. Play proceeds.
31....QxR ch (The Black Rook is removed, but the
White Queen is left at Kkt2)
31 . . . . Black, sweating on the top line, and naturally in a great hurry, plays Q-R sq., thinking, poor fool, that he has captured the White Queen.
32. The finishing touch is obvious, but neat, QxQ mate.
METHOD THE THIRD
Moving the Pieces
There are two sets of pieces which may be moved your own and your opponent's. During the course of a game, when you have decided to move one of your own pieces to a square where its presence is not open to question, pick it up and place it on the said square with a resounding thump. When capturing, sweep the enemy unit off the board with the left hand, and thump your own piece into position with the right.
It is very seldom that you will be allowed to make an illegal move with a piece, with the possible exception of the Knight, which may sometimes, without comment. Be moved two squares like a Bishop. The following method should be used. Pick up the piece, raise it high in the air, keep it there for some considerable time and then after scratching some portion of your anatomy with it, thump it hard down on the board on the desired square. If any subsequent argument occurs, it is better to yield, as it will almost certainly go against you. Indeed any player who will not notice the irregularity of this method will hardly be a worthy opponent. The same might be said of an adversary who does not miss any of the pieces which you may have removed from the board during his absence, with one notable exception. After a few moves, if the Rook, Knight and Bishop remain unmoved on one wing, it is surprising how often the absence of the Knight will not be noticed. Try it and see. The Knight of course should only be removed during your opponent's absence
If you have a losing position, and deliberately upset the pieces, board, table, clock, etc., the game may be given against you. Admittedly the chessmen and the surrounding furniture can be dismantled in some cases without any apparent intention, but such methods are rather outside the scope of this article. Under such circumstances it is better just to play it out. Never resign. After all, we learn more from the games we lose than the games we win.
Do not let your hand hover over the board. Remember that if you touch a piece you have to move it. If your opponent is one of these "hand-hoverers," you may accuse him; during the process of his hovering of having touched a piece you would like to see moved, especially if the game is going against you. If he denies the accusation stick to your guns. If he is supported by witnesses, still stick to them. Refuse to continue the game. Protest to the committee. If you lose the case, you will have the satisfaction of having fought your battle to the end. Never forget that if for any reason you have to leave one Chess club, you can probably always join another
METHOD, THE FOURTH
Psychology
Very careful attention must be paid to the psychological factor in Chess. Dress, for instance, is important. If you turn up in a sober lounge suit, thick spectacles, wild hair and a suitable pallor, clutching various tomes. and there are quite a few, about the game, you will give the impression of being a player of considerable strength and your opponent, exercising more caution than he otherwise might, will probably beat you. On the other hand; if you appear in hunting kit or polo clothes, having due regard to the seasons in which these activities are pursued, covered with mud, and say, "just got here in time. Had to play a few extra chukkas, you know," or, Had a twelve-mile point," it will be taken for granted that you are one of these robust open-air types who regard Chess merely as a side-line, and your adversary is likely to play with corresponding lack of care, giving you a win.
Some players adopt the pipe method. A foul old pipe, charged with plug tobacco, is frequently sufficient to thwart even a master. The disadvantage of this method is that it is liable to be equally discommoding to yourself. It is not recommended that, any player should accustom himself to lethal doses of nicotine in order to win. Chess is a game not a martyrdom. A huge, cigar, especially with the band left on, may be useful, but suffers from the, same, disadvantages. Cigarettes can frequently be used in playing this type of Chess. The method is to inhale a large mouthful of smoke with a piercing hiss, and blow it forcibly downwards over the board. It is hardly permissible to blow the smoke directly into your opponent's face. This lacks finesse. Smoking the butt of a cigarette on a pin sometimes brings results. Another valuable procedure is to leave your cigarette end, unextinguished, in or out of the ash tray. The resultant fumes are indescribably nauseating, and may he tolerated less well by your opponent than by yourself. If he requests you to put the thing out, you can lodge an official complaint to the effect that he is deliberately attempting to divert your attention, and, if he has to put it out himself, he may be put off a little. Chewing tobacco is unfortunately completely out of court.
It is, not profitable to arrive in a state of advanced alcoholic intoxication, if only for the reason that, after a few moves, you will probably get completely fed up with the game and go out to have one or two more during which time your clock will almost certainly run out. This method, indeed, has nothing to be said for it, as alcohol will invariably reduce your powers of concentration. I don't know why I mentioned it at all. It may be that all this writing is making me a bit thirsty.
THE ALIMENTARY METHOD
Food and Chess
A friend of mine a Chess player and a successful business man, wins frequently over the board by consuming a large meal during the process of the game. This method is a very good one, provided your opponent does not take it into his head to checkmate you with one of your own boiled potatoes, or some similar extraneous object.
If you have excellent teeth, the continual cracking of hard sweets or nuts is very often worth about a pawn and move. Chewing gum, if you can get it, is not nearly so effective, although there is no doubt that continual movement of the jaws stimulates the circulation in the neighbourhood of your brain, and may have a paralysing effect on your opponent's faculties. A pot of coffee may be worth the exchange. Coffee, if taken black enough, stimulates whatever mentality there may be, and, furthermore, the whole apparatus may be upset with advantage in critical positions. If, during the process, you succeed in depositing some of the fluid on your opponent's person, you will certainly score, especially, if the coffee is hot.
METHODS OF SCORING
The score must be kept in Chess. There are various ways of doing this. You can do it on a fancy score sheet, .complete with diagram, or on the back of a used envelope. You can write with a gold-mounted fountain pen or a small stub of pencil, the business end of which you lick. There are unfortunately no methods of score-keeping which constitute a weapon in the-armoury of the. experienced Chess player, for the simple reason that keeping the score is somewhat distracting to oneself and any elaborations would be more distracting still. Luscious licking of the pencil, heavy breathing, and extensive flaunting of the tongue while writing may disconcert your opponent, but will certainly adversely affect your own concentration. The same thing is true of a state and. a squeaky slate pencil. A large bottle of ink may be useful, as it can, like a coffee-pot, be upset at an. opportune moment.
It goes without saying that occasional inaccuracies should be introduced into the score, in order to support any subsequent statements on your part that the position is incorrectly set up. Such inaccuracies are especially valuable when the time comes for adjournment, and a sealed move has to be made.
The following end-game, in which the author had the White pieces, will illustrate this point
The time for adjournment was drawing near, so White played 41. K-B3, but entered this move on the score-sheet as K-Kt3. Black fell into the trap and played 41....Q-Q8, after which he placed the optimistic letters ch, White after considerable deliberation, sealed the move 42. Q-K8 mate.
If the sealed move has to be made by your opponent the procedure is somewhat similar, as in the following example, where the author has the White pieces again, but more subtlety is necessary in the initial stages of the combination.
37. R-Q2 (entered, in the score as R(2)-QB2). Black scaled the move 37... RxR on which 38.RxR. mates. A point in my favour, here was the meticulous way in which I particularised my 37th move in contra-distinction to Black's slipshod RxR.
This method is not of course. suitable in presence of very careful supervision, which does not usually occur. The resumption of such, adjourned games should be postponed by you until the last possible moment. If you can achieve a week's delay, for instance, your position is impregnable. There will naturally be furious arguments when the position is reset, but your word is as good as your opponent's.
POSTURAL METHODS
These are Important. No player can hope to win games 'by sitting absolutely still in his chair.' In such a posture the circulation stagnates. The blood, collects in a torpid marsh somewhere in the neighbourhood of the liver, and there is very little left for the brain. The great Dr.Tarrasch, we are told, was practically immobile over the. Chess board, BUT we are also told, he sat on his. hands, thus carrying. out the medical procedure of auto-transfusion, whereby the extremities are compressed to drive the blood into the centre of the body,.and so improve the circulation.
After making your move, you should certainly get up and have a walk around, at least. It will whip up your circulation, give you a change of scene, and if you have just done something to which your opponent may object, carry you out of earshot. In a tournament, if you have a favourable position, some profitable moments may be spent adjacent to the boards of your closest rivals An elaboration of this method is to leave the board with heavy footsteps and return well out of your opponent's line of vision, on tiptoe. Then cough loudly at an opportune, moment. Another, variation is silently to place a chair behind him, Sit on it, and stare fixedly at the back of his neck. Some subconscious impulse will invariably cause him to turn and look at you, when he me very unstrung
Another good method is to perform physical exercises on the floor Nobody can possibly object to this, and it is very good for you. It is also rather distressing to your opponent and everybody else. If anyone tries to stop you, quote Nimzowitch, who attributed his success, at some tournament or other, to such a course of physical exercises.
An Indian Chess player of my acquaintance, who is a yogi, stands on his head between moves. He tells me that, this greatly benefits the circulation of blood, inside his brain, and I do not doubt it. As he is somewhat unaccustomed to European dress he almost invariably forgets to remove the contents of' his. pockets before upending himself, and the subsequent clatter, combined with his rather unusual posture, followed by the necessary collection, on all fours, of coins, penknives, etc., helps his game a great deal.
While you are actually in your chair, squirm about in it. Cross one leg over the other, and in doing so hit the table a good sharp tap with your toe. Another excellent method is to lean your head in your hands, and let it slide lower and lower on to the board. Your opponent will become alarmed and ask you if you are all right, when you can accuse him of interference. Take a captured piece in your fingers, and appear to be tearing it to pieces. This helps concentration by providing a sort of counter-irritation. Chewing chessmen is perhaps going a bit too far.
If you are physically robust, the following method is very paying indeed. Tip your chair further and further back until you actually fall over backwards. This method needs room, which is not available to that extent in every Chess club. This procedure can be employed if you wish to upset the board, table, pieces, etc., making it appear an accident. I should remind you again that this method postulates a degree of physical toughness. It is hardly worth while injuring yourself simply to win, or attempt to win, a game of Chess.
METHODS OF USING COLOUR
Strictly perhaps this section should be included in PSYCHOLOGY, but I am dealing with this method .separately, as it is of no little importance.
It is needless to say that any violently coloured tie, of the birthday gift variety, tends to upset your opponent. Such a tie is very valuable if worn during the morning session of a tournament, at which time of day it is liable to cause widespread nausea amongst players, officials, spectators and everybody else who can see it. You can't !
A purple face, combined with an average intellect, is a powerful weapon, due simply to the fact that a purple face usually indicates an intellect not only below the average, but also well pickled. I once knew a violent tee-totaller and a very intellectual gentleman whose face in colour and consistency suggested a lifetime of hearty drunkenness interrupted by no mental activity more vigorous than the placing of bets. He took up Chess and did very well indeed.
A white tie, combined with a white face, especially if accompanied by a delicately congested nose, will induce such a feeling of collapse and chronic indigestion in your opponent, that they are worth to you about a knight. There is also the resource of giving the impression that you are suffering from some loathsome disease by turning up stinking of iodine and bandaged to the eyebrows apart from a short expanse of skin coloured green with purple spots. Your opponent will probably recede so far from the board as to interfere seriously with his powers of combination.
ACOUSTICAL METHODS
These a re very effective, and quite easy to use. Hum continuously, or whistle through your lips, or teeth, or both. If your opponent objects, you vigorously deny doing anything of the sort, and accuse him of the same thing. If you have an overwhelming position, a sotto voce rendering of the Dead March in Saul, accompanied by a pitying stare, will help you to win more quickly.
If you are on the losing end, croon the "Flowers of the Forest," and attempt to weep. These tactics will probably arouse such remorse in the heart of your, adversary that he may give you the game purely on compassionate grounds.
Noises should be subtle. Methods such as lighting fireworks under the table, employing penny squeakers and kazoos and liberating Bronx cheers are not to be recommended. One player I knew could make the most, disconcerting noises, deep in his diaphragm, apparently without moving a muscle. This was very useful to him. Ventriloquism, if you are so accomplished, is the method of choice. When your opponent is about to move, a hoarse whisper apparently coming from about two feet above his left ear, exclaiming "That's the wrong knight, you silly old buffer," is extremely disconcerting.
THE NEGATIVE METHOD
Although this method is not altogether satisfactory, in that it prevents one from playing Chess altogether it has a great deal to be said for it, especially as a reputation builder.
The Method is to frequent some Chess Club, apparently deep in thought. When you join the Club, and you are asked to define your playing strength, you smile pityingly, and reply, " I hardly know, you'd better ask them in Moscow."
Appear to read all the books in the library. If invited to play, you can languidly remark-
Well, I don't think so, if you don't mind. I'm a bit pre-occupied at present, you see. I'm in the middle of a match with Bierstein."
Who's he ?
"I don't think he's known over here yet. He's one of the rising Soviet players. He gave Botwinnik a bit of a fright the other day."
"Well, bring him along."
"Oh, I don't think I could. You see, he doesn't even want to be SEEN. I don't even know why he came over. I think it's some secret business about factories.
All this creates a grand atmosphere. The Chess playing public is deeply impressed by the idea of obscure Russians, who work twenty-three hours a day in large, bare Institutions, learning about electricity, and spend the twenty-fourth hour, usually about midnight, knocking the stuffing out of effete grandmasters.
If you are invited to participate in a tournament or club championship, ask the secretary for a list of the players, and then decline in writing, politely. Don't be too polite. Infer, if you have the literary ability, that you consider it a piece of damned impertinence to be invited to play with a bunch of rabbits. Then join another club.
CONCLUSION
Well, that's all about Chess. I've shown this article to my friend Ginlifter, who made several characteristic remarks which do not intend to repeat here.
Ginlifter is a bit of a Chess player himself, but is, quite frank in stating that he prefers bars to Chess clubs. When he is playing Chess, he says, he keeps on wondering why he is doing it. He has no such misgivings in a bar, though he might have in a morgue.
His habit of, saying Check " when slapping his tankard on the bar counter to be refilled, has caused quite a bit of speculation in numerous public houses over a wide area.